Welcome to SomaliNet Forums, a friendly and gigantic Somali centric active community. Login to hide this block

You are currently viewing this page as a guest. By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics, ask questions, educate others, use the advanced search, subscribe to threads and access many, many other features. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join SomaliNet forums today! Please note that registered members with over 50 posts see no ads whatsoever! Are you new to SomaliNet? These forums with millions of posts are just one section of a much larger site. Just visit the front page and use the top links to explore deep into SomaliNet oasis, Somali singles, Somali business directory, Somali job bank and much more. Click here to login. If you need to reset your password, click here. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us.

Question on virginity

Arimaha qoyska maanta

Moderators: Moderators, Junior Moderators, Islam mods

OUR SPONSOR: LOGIN TO HIDE
Zara_123
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Jul 20, 2005 12:14 am
Location: canada

Question on virginity

Postby Zara_123 » Fri Aug 05, 2005 2:34 am

hello!
My name is Zara, I'm 18 and live in canada. my mother is canadian (white) and my dad is Somali. I have never known my father and have been raised by my mother. I live in a part of canada where there aren't many Africans let alone Somalis so I don't understand much about the culture. So I was wondering if you guys could help me out!

I have been raised as a canadian, have only known our media, and have had pressure from peers, but I have remained a virgin. Now this is a sensitive subject and I am embarassed to speak of such things. But ever scince a young age I have naturally covered my body, and have seen it as hugely important to stay a virgin until mariage. I can't explain it to my friends but I see it as shameful and wrong..even though no one is stopping me, I have boys after me all the time, and I am confidant, I still refuse!

So here is the question... is this just me and my craziness, or is this some kind of innate Somali thing. Is being a virgin really important to Somali women and their families???

Also I am interested in finding my father and his family, because I believe a person can't truly belong to their future until they know their past! Would such things be an issue, would it be a sourse of pride... or would anyone give a care? (theoretically speaking, not that I want them to know my personal things of that nature) But perhaps it would be enough that I am a good, smart, fun person. And honestly say if they were to find out would they accept me more if I were a virgin? Also if I marry a somali man would it be important to him and his family??

Perhaps these are stupid questions and I know that things aren't so strict in cities and for families in the west but please tell me your opinions. I especially want to know what women think on this topic!

Thanks and have a good day

Zara Smile

Nayree
Posts: 23
Joined: Wed Aug 03, 2005 7:00 am

Postby Nayree » Sat Aug 06, 2005 11:26 am

Hi Zara

I am a somalien girl...
In our culture it is huge thing to be a virgin before you marry, this is mainly because of our religion.
As you must know most somali's are muslims and in Islam both the woman and the man has to remain a virgin until they marry.

I know that most somali people rarely marry people non somali,
i don't know the case with your father but it is important that you marry a somali guy.

Personally i don't think that it is a must that you should marry a somalien guy.

I am sorry that i can't give you more information regarding our culture but that is only due to my not being raised within a somali culture.

I hope you have found the information that i can give is satisfactory for you Smile

User avatar
true_poet
Posts: 42
Joined: Fri Jul 18, 2003 7:00 pm
Location: t.dot

Salaam dear sister in Islam..

Postby true_poet » Thu Aug 11, 2005 11:01 pm

Bismillah(In the Name of Allah)

Dear sister in Islam, i am glad that you shy away from the evil that Allah(swt) forbid. The only reason why you kept away from this evil is by the will and Love of Allah(swt). He kept you pure and wishes good for you...so u must stay pure and good sister. In todays world where women are like sex object accept the righteous muslim women who covers and shys away from tempations and evil, its really ease to fall to Satan's trap.

You have to understand only Islam..gives a person honor, dignity, respect and purification. Only Islam keeps one away from evil..because they fear jahannam(Hell-Fire) which man and stones will be her fuel in the hereafter..may Allah(swt) save us from it.

Allah(swt) created us and sent us to earth..as mission of submission. We are only created to worship and remember He who has created us from semen.

Our beloved Messenger Muhammad(peace be upon him) told us that if you want to earn paradise..you face many hardships to get there. And if you want to earn Hell-Fire..you will face no hardship..accept ease evil deeds. So..i have to say..you must pay the price for Paradise.

Its not culture or because that your father is somali that you kept away from evil. But its because of the fav and Mercy of Allah(swt) Your Creator. So what should you do in return?
Learn about Islam. And let your role-modle be our messenger Muhammad (peace be upon him) and his wives(peace be upon them all) who are the mothers of believers.

Please watch the following flash movies in and it will teach you a lot already Inshallah.



1) http://www.what-is-islam.org/islamvschrist.html
2) http://www.what-is-islam.org/quraan.html
3) http://www.what-is-islam.org/prophetmoh.html

p.s I am writting this to you because i care and i wish that you stay pure and become a righteous muslimah(the best women in the face of earth is..a muslim women). Stay away from the boyz you know..and marrying a righteous somali/muslim brother..will only bring you good..never harm..that is a promise. If you need more help..let me know.

jazaka'Allah kheir (may Allah reward you) for your good heart and open your heart to Islam. Insha'Allah.

Your brother in Islam.

wa.salaam
Last edited by true_poet on Thu Aug 11, 2005 11:33 pm, edited 2 times in total.

User avatar
Smooth_Qaaxoti
SomaliNet Heavyweight
SomaliNet Heavyweight
Posts: 1480
Joined: Sun Apr 24, 2005 11:58 am
Location: nigga, please. i'm right under yo mom's diraac....

Postby Smooth_Qaaxoti » Thu Aug 11, 2005 11:08 pm

It's your virginity you talking about.

User avatar
true_poet
Posts: 42
Joined: Fri Jul 18, 2003 7:00 pm
Location: t.dot

hey there..

Postby true_poet » Thu Aug 11, 2005 11:27 pm

She came to ask help from her people. Her brothers and sisters in Islam. It does not matter what the topic is. We as muslims..are brothers and sisters in Islam..therefore..we help each other.

Islam is advise..advise..advise..said the last messenger to mankind Muhammad(peace be upon him). So, we muslims advise each other every day. It does not matter if you live in africa, asia..mars..whatever. Help is always there in the muslim community. That is why the ummah(nation) is the best nation ever raised from mankind. Allah(swt) said that. Remember..we are not the chosen people like the jews say..no no...rather..we are example of good and role-modle to mankind. Thats why you see many latina's african Americans..asians..etc coming to Islam..because it gives security to the heart. It gives love and cares for the soul..instead of wasting life focusing on the body.

so..please if you aint gona help..then don't reply.

thank you.

peace

User avatar
SoMaLiSiZz
SomaliNet Heavyweight
SomaliNet Heavyweight
Posts: 2079
Joined: Sun Jul 08, 2001 7:00 pm
Location: {{ Ard Allah }}
Contact:

Postby SoMaLiSiZz » Wed Aug 17, 2005 4:22 am

Asalam alaikm




dear sister stay strong and do some reseaches on or on how to be a pious muslim women, change freinds if they think u are odd, pick muslims friends and if u need one I am here for u insha*Allah give send me a Pm .. and lsiten to the good brother true Mahs*Allah he seams smart up




Fe Aman Allah

WarsameBoy
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Jul 23, 2003 7:00 pm

Postby WarsameBoy » Thu Aug 18, 2005 12:25 pm

Hi there,

just wanna give you little input here, being virgin is really good thing to be specially if you are young girl born or either raised in Western World where sex is just not a big deal and women and men have sex with no string attached. As far as Somali culture is concern if you are Somali girl you don't give to any one, you only give to someone who has earned in other words your husband. this is not to say Somali girlz don't have sex before marriage, as the matter of fact there are not many of them who have sex before marriage, mostly likely the emotion of sex drive might be too stong for them to hold till the ideal husband comes, or might some of them get hooked up with drugs and lost their sense of self control. but if you have self control and free from drugs and it seems to me you have sense of self control and fee from drugs. you could stay virgin till good caring HUSBAND SHOWS UP, but again this is not to say nobody wants non virgin girlz as the matter of fact there are some guys that don't mind as long as the girl has winning personality after all we are humans and subject to mistakes. AS FAR AS SOMALI CULTURE PHILOSOPHY IS CONCERN STAYING VIRGIN GIVES YOU AN EDGE OVER...... YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN EH. my advice to you is to stay vingin and learn Somali Culture and Islam. Culture Philosophy gives you pride so as Islam. ALLah said in his Quran "the best of you is the one who fears Allah" see this is very powerful words, in western world they consider the girl being ugly just because she is fat but in Somali Culture the women are judged only the content of her character but not her being fat or she has ugly face and stuff. wish you all the best

Regards,
Warsame

Abdi-Asis Farah
Posts: 1
Joined: Tue Mar 29, 2005 8:54 pm
Location: Nairobi
Contact:

Postby Abdi-Asis Farah » Thu Aug 18, 2005 11:38 pm

Can we change the subject and talk about something else besides her virginity? Why do some folks ask brainless questions? Remember old good days when kids use their brains and some common sense! O'h boy O' boy!!

DEEP_SOUL
SomaliNetizen
SomaliNetizen
Posts: 755
Joined: Mon Jun 06, 2005 11:06 am
Location: bristol,uk

Postby DEEP_SOUL » Sat Aug 27, 2005 2:45 am

As a strong somali woman myself it's very important to be a virgin no matter what race you are living with.

As long you are muslim and you cover your body.Thinking about sex all the time wouldnt be so much important anyway.Just stay strong dont listen to your friends.Just be your own self that's all.

liban2006
Posts: 13
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm
Location: from

Postby liban2006 » Wed Mar 15, 2006 8:29 pm

my english wife was'nt virgin before I marry her and I'm still happy, but if she were somalian I would never marry, because I believe non somali virgin girl is bitch and hopeless, I wish in the future if I'm lucky I'll marry a beautyful somali virgin girl. inshah allah. my advise of sister sara is IF YOU'R DOING SOMETHING GOOD KEEP DOING IT,
Very Happy Crying or Very sad Cool

SUMAYA02
Posts: 6
Joined: Sat Feb 23, 2008 8:04 pm

Re: Question on virginity

Postby SUMAYA02 » Mon Mar 03, 2008 10:35 pm

TO ZARA GIRL DON'T BE shy its ok you haven't said anything graphic any how yes its important to be virgin not only for the guy you will marry but for your self for your dignity and people value that you might listen to some islamic lectures about women in youtube . iam not suggesting that you became a muslim iam just trying to show you how important to remain virgin is.

could you tell who ur father is last name first name what tribe he belongs to some of us might be able to help you meet your family he shouldn't be leaving his daughter like that any ways sorry its not islamic that man to abandant their children. iam sure ur mother has done a great job bring you up and iam happy for the person you are and how you say away from all the negative thigs around u even though its not easy

sorry zara but i got to respond to this LIBAN GUY DONT' Get offended



LIBAN you said your english wife wasn't virgin but ur still happy and will want to marry somali women in the future that is virgin . let me ask you something p..... is a p.... if its virgin its special but why wouldn't you marry a somali non virgin women since you married non muslim who might of had more then 20 guys if not more to have intimacy with her when a somali women might not be virgin because some somali nigga lie to her or got engaged to her and took her virginity and left her. why can't those women have a second chance why do theyhave to be ............Ho............ as you mentioned huh. what if your sister was married of to a man and was divorce in a month or less is it her fault that she isn't virgin. and some guys might not believe her if she told them she is a devorce because of this sick ignorent believe of somali women being dirt trust me their is nothing more beautiful more pure and cleaner then a somali women i can't imaging being married and having intimacy with someone who doesn't wash off their private parts except when they shower maybe this is something exceptable with some of you but not me peace


OUR SPONSOR: LOGIN TO HIDE

Hello, Has your question been answered on this page? We hope yes. If not, you can start a new thread and post your question(s). It is free to join. You can also search our over a million pages (just scroll up and use our site-wide search box) or browse the forums.

  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to “Ask The Experts - Family Matters”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests