Do Somali mothers contribute to their children's

[makumba59]

The habaar of a mother is nothing compare to that of a father.

A mother can spit all the habaars under the sun, but its all just mouth.

But that of the father on the other hand is something else all together.

[Basra-]

Now that i have recovered from the laughter above let me throw in my two cents.



Sir Lug......



Those habaars makes zero effect on a 'young delicate mind'


these habaars balances it out with the exessive love somali mothers give-especially to their 'sons'! Besides these habaar are all talk- as makumba59 above here has stated. Mother insitictive love their babies so all habaar are null & void in Allaahs eyes. The real habaar comes outside the mother- Caasiniimo from kids themselves--etc etc...Allaah habaars them even though mother still blesses her child with all his caasiniimo!

Sir Lug i am disappointed at u! I thought the topic was an in depth discussion about the mummification of somali mothers on their dotted sons. This aspect needs psychological study. That explains their looserniimo!

[makumba59]

^^Obviously you cant relate to this topic as you werent fortunate enough to grow up in a somali household nor around somalis.

consider yourself exempt from this issue.

[Basra-]

makumba59 aka Qansa

walaal please refrain from being abusive.

[HaileyBailey]

Oh My GOD!!!
Is that where Lug you got your name from, je je je, from Habaar?

Yes, I have hated my mother for the habaars, especially since I was a nice kid and teen: I never left the home to party, I loved staying home and watching TV, I was always the homebody and I never brought adoons or gaalo to my house even as girlfriends. I didn't get why I must bleed from my eyes and get aids for not cleaning my room. To be honest, those habaars have kept me awake some nights, thinking that I would wake up the next day with blood pouring out of my eyes. I sometimes wished that my mom could just hit me. The worst was that my brothers didn't get most of the habaar because they were not expected to clean and help out in the house, so when ever there was something wrong domestically I always got the blame.

[Cawar]

Some of today's mothers are worse..esp some single moms I have seen throughout..it makes the old moms sound like priests.

Cursing their kids with : Aabaha iyo khaniski ku dhalay, wecelyow wecelku dhalay and certain caays I cant even mention.

Waa nation baaba'ay iy umad ilahay inkartisa ku dhacday somalida..

Allah Maxaad meel lagu jabay jaqala weyned?

Lol. Sad but true.

I saw many things ..that led me to believe and seriously consider never to get married..esp. to a somali woman..and iff I do.. never to divorce here..and if that happens..never to leave my kids with her.

[SummerRain]

^^ Funny you say that. It has been proven time and again, that Somali men are the ones the divorce the children once they divorce their wives. Individually, you have the right to your opinion but you must not forget that Somali women mostly are bitter about their situation since they are not getting the spousal assistance they deserve and need. And that anger could, and will be potentially reflected on the children. Yu have to give Somali women, divorced or married alot of credit here b/c they are ultimately filling the shoes left by the fathers.

What with the double standards anyways with you men? how is a non somali women any better than a SOmali one and why is it ok for you head that direction whilst criticizing the sisters who do it? Running away is not the answer to this problem, but facing it by fulfilling our responsibilities as husbands and wives. Qofka isku diin iyo dhaqan aa tahiin wax kaga fiicaan maleh. Just pray you end up with a person with those qualities and values.

[Cawar]

Ismahan,

All I said and talked about was what I saw and what I would do..I am not criticizing anyone here.

Dont I have the option to choose? where did you ever see me saying anything negative about somali women who go with Ajnabis?? Never.

Anyways, I know that there are a lot of somali fathers who abandon their wives as well as their kids..and I personally know some..
But that doesnt excuse the fact that these mothers are projecting their anger towards their own kids and that would have a negative effect on the kids upbringing..dont you agree??

Again, I hope I wont be in that predicament..but I am ever..I will make sure that my kids wont go through what some kids are going through now a days.

[HELWAA]

Bisinka... ...Every mother is a role model to her children.What most somalis dont realize is that they are teachers and children take all their bad habits and good once.Children dont do what you say to them they do what you do.Hadaad ku tiraahdid ciyaalka been lama sheego oo bacda 5 daqiiq intu qof telefoonka kugu soo qaraaco aad ku tiraahdid ilmaha yar hooyo ma joogto ku dheh....bal eeg....Every parents have to think about their actions infront of the chidren.Abusing and yelling is not a good solution to reslove problems.The only thing they well learn from that is to fear you.And the reslut are...more been iyo khiyaamo.

[Basra-]

[quote="Ismahan123"]^What with the double standards anyways with you men? how is a non somali women any better than a SOmali one quote]

Ismahaan this question should not be addressed to all somali men but to xidigow alone. He is the one bragging about his fat cadaan mistress from tuuloo.




PS: Nevermind me, i am just striken with 'Maseer".

[Salah Al-Din]

Assalaamu Alaikum,

No need to blame parents for your trauma. Being an adult means taking responsiblity for your own actions. There is nothing in life you cannot overcome. Pull up your socks and change your paradigm. Change your life. Mobilize your inner strength and rely on Allah. This victimhood mentality must not be nurtered.

Wassalaam

[SummerRain]

Assalaamu Alaikum,

No need to blame parents for your trauma. Being an adult means taking responsiblity for your own actions. There is nothing in life you cannot overcome. Pull up your socks and change your paradigm. Change your life. Mobilize your inner strength and rely on Allah. This victimhood mentality must not be nurtered.

Wassalaam

We are talking about parent interaction with kids and adolescents.

Are you suggesting that your upbringing had no influence on you?


Basra
Miskin.... atleast if he was going for a fat chick, he was better off sticking with you ( Somali) so maahan?

[SummerRain]

Ismahan,

All I said and talked about was what I saw and what I would do..I am not criticizing anyone here.

Dont I have the option to choose? where did you ever see me saying anything negative about somali women who go with Ajnabis?? Never.

Anyways, I know that there are a lot of somali fathers who abandon their wives as well as their kids..and I personally know some..
But that doesnt excuse the fact that these mothers are projecting their anger towards their own kids and that would have a negative effect on the kids upbringing..dont you agree??

Again, I hope I wont be in that predicament..but I am ever..I will make sure that my kids wont go through what some kids are going through now a days.

As I said, you are entitled to your opinion. I was speaking generally, that these same single mother makers are the onse to talk down to Somali sisters and run to non somalis. But when the sisters do the same, she is labelled off.

Secondly, what you witnessed is Somali women being the product of their relationships and trying to deal with that reality plus being a single parent. And if you observed more closely its not just Somali women that reflect the angry on their kids b/c of being a Single parent. And you are right, it will effect them negatively as I said previously however, my point is to note what is the cause of that anger and bitterness. We can not unfairly keep blaming these poor women while just putting the blame off on the father.
Why cant I never see a man around here or else where criticizing those fathers who are roaming the streets making more single mothers? But they are so quick to talk down about the sisters and run to non somalis.

[Basra-]

Ismahaan!!!!!!!!!



I fail to understand the need to attack me in this unprovoked discussion. Just because i mentioned the word 'fat' doesn't mean i meant it to direct it to u!!! Didn't u read the "Cadaan tuuloo fat' part????? Helooooo!!!!

[Kolombo]

I once saw a Xaayoow woman saying to her stubborn son, "Soo kac, kor halaguu xiree."

Kor halaguu xiree=May they hang you.