SomaliNet Forums

dedication to the mali sisters

Yungfresh,

We've all seen it bro. Come to any masjid and see a new convert. First thing You'll hear is this guys looking for a SOMALI wife, not A WIFE weeks after becoming Muslim. No offense its not because Somali girls are special but its because these guys view Somali girls as the most EASY and that bothers me being a Somali.

Yungfresh,

We've all seen it bro. Come to any masjid and see a new convert. First thing You'll hear is this guys looking for a SOMALI wife, not A WIFE weeks after becoming Muslim. No offense its not because Somali girls are special but its because these guys view Somali girls as the most EASY and that bothers me being a Somali.

Is your masjid Dar Al Noor?

Lol @ the Eritrean guy you mentioned. What about your former boss?

This issue of certain thugs who become muslim, start wearing thobes and then marry women without their guardians consent.

This isn't marriage. This is zina. I didn't read past this. I don't know how any of you did.


On point of the topic though, what Alchemist said is true. For some reason, a lot of our sisters would be willing to live in their parents basement with their newly reformed/reverted ex-con Muslim, but give trouble to a regular clean background Somali brother who just graduated college by asking him to pay for a rifrakingdiculous wedding reception, Hajj as a mehr, and expect a down payment to have already been made on a condo. I know at least one case where one of these guys divorced his wife of less than a year, because he got into an Islamic university overseas and couldn't take her. WTF!?

Then again, the majority of the cases I've seen where Somalis married new Muslims have been amazing ones. Usually, it's the Somali-Somali marriages that are rocky. Perhaps our sisters' fear of us is rooted in some truth. Given what we all hear about the previous generation's pattern with marriage, the current lifestyle of many Somali guys in the west, and the impact of fatherless households on impressionable young Somali girls... I don't place all the blame on them. But at the end of the day, it's their choice. No one can force their hand into "marriage", or what seems to be in my understanding, zina.

I went back to read the OP. Yeah, pretty much what I thought.

Yungfresh,

We've all seen it bro. Come to any masjid and see a new convert. First thing You'll hear is this guys looking for a SOMALI wife, not A WIFE weeks after becoming Muslim. No offense its not because Somali girls are special but its because these guys view Somali girls as the most EASY and that bothers me being a Somali.

Is your masjid Dar Al Noor?

Lol @ the Eritrean guy you mentioned. What about your former boss?

lool, no @ hijrah


And my bloody former boss. He'd talk around the office how his wife is circumcised, but he still 'gets the job done' SMDH

Main reason for this epidemic in our community:

Generally speaking Somali girls outperform Somali males and therefore Somali males that are eligible for marriage are often few
Somali girls can often be very naive and in many cases will go against the advice and wishes of family and friends
Somali culture is very welcoming, kind and open


I dare any brother in this thread or site to go to your masjid and ask a Pakistani or Arab brother for their sister or daughter for marriage, please share his response. I don't care what anyone says, regarding Muslinimo etc, that Pakistani or Arab brother will reject you and in frank words tell you where to go. Even Somalida can be jahiliin, A black brother is more likely to face resistance when marrying a Somali girl then a White revert brother. I know one Somali sister that married a mixed race revert, the family were not happy but after pressure from their daughter conceded defeat. This led to the usual nonsense gossip by other somalis and the family were justifying their decision by saying, 'waa niin caad aw quraxbadan', because he was mixed race.

All i know is that constant marrying and divorcing and the evergoing drive to mary 4 women at once is causing social problems.
what happens to the young divorced woman?

I dare any brother in this thread or site to go to your masjid and ask a Pakistani or Arab brother for their sister or daughter for marriage, please share his response. I don't care what anyone says, regarding Muslinimo etc, that Pakistani or Arab brother will reject you and in frank words tell you where to go..

This is my point, and this is what really, truly bothers me. I mean how gabdhaha kale from other races are so qaali, and hard to get while to marry a Somali is so easy. I mean are we inferior to those other races?


Also ur right, it also bothers me with the jaahilnimo and how the same standards arn't applied with all converts, but where whites are more welcomed while blacks are not. At least apply the same criteria and principles.

Alchemist/Yungfresh,


Theres something about Somali girls, may Allah bless them, that they just come across as extremely desperate for marraige, and thats not a good thing. Compared to girls from other races, they seem the most willing to just marry anybody and everybody. I wonder why that is.

As painful as it is to admit sxb, it's cuz of us. How many Somali guys are really marriageable...I'd say 7/10 are either dirtbags, unambitious, in jail, jaad-heads or some combination. Take a look at any major university in any city with a large Somali population, and you'll see a trend where there's a 10:1 ratio of Somali girls to Somali guys. After a certain point, you can't blame them for looking elsewhere...cuz where there's demand, someone will supply. But they could definitely make better choices than some of them do when they marry outside the race.

Funny story, there's an cadaan guy I grew up with who became Muslim a few years ago...he told me "when I reverted, all the brothers at the Masjid were telling me to marry a Somali girl cuz that's what all the brothers do when they revert"...made me pause Wallahi, but that's what happens when there's not enough MaashaAllaah Somali guys to go around for all the MaashaAllaah Somali girls.

p.s. No girls are allowed to agree with my comment

I agree with your comment.

It seems everyone who is anyone somehow witnessed this trend,as sad as it may be except me.I have yet to see these stuff.A sister from the masjid married a Sudani guy (they went to high school together) and most of the Somalis were shunning her.

Is that really what we wanna do?Paint everyone who isnt Somali with the same brush.

Every case should be assessed indivdually.

Every case should be assessed indivdually.

But yes Beans, there is a trend. Sisters who just started practicing the deen because of a few SalafiPublications lectures they've come across online run off and marry the most "Salafi" guy they can find, who isn't Somali. And yes, these guys boast about it.

war ha iska goorsadan naka daaya, intey meelaha taagtaag lahayen. hado nin ajnabi idinka asturo wa khair.

Every case should be assessed indivdually.

But yes Beans, there is a trend. Sisters who just started practicing the deen because of a few SalafiPublications lectures they've come across online run off and marry the most "Salafi" guy they can find, who isn't Somali. And yes, these guys boast about it.

People will always make bad choices.It is up to her,the family to provide the necessary advice and hope the naive chick makes the right choice.

Somalida can be very very involved in ur personal for all the wrong reason.If there was such a good community involvement and people worked together to better their ties,we would have young naive girls running off to the first dude that shows them some attention.

Beans,


No offense, but I think its because Somali girls come off as desperate when it comes to marriage. Take Your time, be patient, make dua, and marry a good dude Ajanabi or not.

Murax Is that such a bad thing? If a girl has reached adulthood and knows she wants to get married,for whatever reason be it to avoid zina,where is the harm in that?