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Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

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IRONm@N
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Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby IRONm@N » Wed May 02, 2012 9:07 pm

The Rolling Stones said it best, "You, you make a dead man cum." A 38 year old female mortuary worker is being held on $250,000 bond after becoming pregnant by one of her clients-a dead man. The alleged crime took place at the Mourning Glory Mortuary just outside of Lexington, Missouri. Police have charged Felicity Marmaduke with desecration of the dead and necrophilia.
According to a statement made to police by Marmaduke, the alleged victim experienced a post mortem erection while being bathed. Being alone, Marmaduke straddled the dead man and proceeded have sex with him. Much to her surprise, the alleged victim came to orgasm after several minutes. A few weeks later, Marmaduke had a positive pregnancy test while receiving a routine medical exam. Upon telling her doctor the circumstances leading to the conception, the police were notified. Marmaduke was arrested without incident at her dilapidated trailer home a few blocks from the mortuary.

In a bizarre twist, Marmaduke plans to sue the dead man's estate for child support

http://www.deadseriousnews.com/?p=524
:lol:

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby Tuushi » Wed May 02, 2012 9:10 pm

Man,u gotta love America. :lol:

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby Lamagoodle » Wed May 02, 2012 9:30 pm

This sounds like Daanyeer's scoop.

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby eliteSomali » Wed May 02, 2012 9:32 pm

WTF.

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby mcali » Wed May 02, 2012 9:38 pm

I cant believe that shit is possible.

Thats why its good for the family to wash the dead person

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby Lamagoodle » Wed May 02, 2012 9:39 pm

It is because he was rich. Child support.

Neccessity

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby yungnfresh » Wed May 02, 2012 9:54 pm

Y'all are gullible :lol:

86 year old woman pepper-sprayed, stripped at Wal-Mart

November 27, 2011 by Dead Serious News ·

Ethel Waters, an 86 year old great-grandmother from Monroe, Louisiana, was pepper-sprayed by police upon exiting the public restroom at her local Wal-Mart store.  Her crime?  Shoplifting adult diapers.
Waters was standing in line for the doors to open at midnight on Black Friday when, unable to control her bladder, soiled her adult diaper.  The great-grandmother had her sights set on a Nintendo Wii for Julius, her 5 year old great-grandson.  Unfortunately for Waters, she had left her diapers in her car.  Not wanting to lose her place in line, she endured the wet diaper.  As midnight approached, Waters was verbally berated by fellow shoppers for “stinking like piss.”
Once Wal-Mart’s doors opened at midnight, Waters made a bee-line for the Nintendo Wii.  Unable to keep up with the crowd, Waters was barely able to grab the last Wii.  Much to her consternation, Waters was harassed by several fellow shoppers for taking the last of the game consoles.  One morbidly obese woman in an electric scooter referred to Waters as a “stinky old piss bag.”  Humiliated, Waters went to the pharmacy section to buy some adult diapers.  The shopper in the scooter followed her.

Waters grabbed a box of adult diapers and took them into the restroom with her, along with the Wii.  The woman in the scooter alerted a nearby female police officer that Waters was shoplifting merchandise.  Once Waters had exited the bathroom, the police officer noted that the box of diapers had been opened.  When Waters was asked if she had shoplifted a diaper, she started to “get defensive” according to the police report.  Unresponsive to the question, the police officer hit Waters with pepper spray.  Once on the ground, the officer reached under Waters’ skirt and removed her diaper as evidence.  Waters was handcuffed and is being held on $5,000 bail.  While being escorted out of the store, witnesses claim that Waters kept screaming  that she was going to pay for the diapers as a trail of urine followed her out of the store.

Calls to Wal-Mart in regards to this incident were not returned.


http://www.deadseriousnews.com/?p=1354

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby IRONm@N » Wed May 02, 2012 9:55 pm

It is because he was rich. Child support.

Neccessity
yea, I think so too.

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby Tuushi » Wed May 02, 2012 9:56 pm

yung ruined it. :down: :lol:

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby Lamagoodle » Wed May 02, 2012 10:01 pm

There was this story of necrophilia in the newspapers in Scandnavia a few years ago. A mortuary employee raped a dead woman and he was caught with his pants down.

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby yungnfresh » Wed May 02, 2012 10:03 pm

yung ruined it. :down: :lol:
Have a heart, it was getting painful to watch theories start swirling :lol: :down:

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby sexy-kitten » Thu May 03, 2012 1:13 am

This sounds like Daanyeer's scoop.
Exactly what I thought as I clicked on the topic. I was shocked it wasn't Daanyeer who posted it.

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Re: Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

Postby hipsterrunoff » Thu May 03, 2012 6:24 pm

Lmao, @t the op. i knew this couldn't be real. :lol:


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