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I finally got over the only gentleman that courted me, I hate the word dated I'm old fashioned I guess. It took me three years. Other gentlemen have attempted to get to know me, but I gave them the cold shoulder. Perhaps there was insurmountable guilt I felt for giving someone else a shot. I erroneously assumed no one would like me as much, be so kind, or match my checklist. I was brainwashed by other people that fell for that "first love crap." I spent most my adult life not dating anyone, partly because I didn't get the point. Plus I had all these ridged rules of engagement. That and I cared far too much about keeping a good image. Weird. I know. I also thought the first dude would be it. Crazy talk. When we were talking I foresaw trouble in paradise. I'd rather not get into specifics, I care about him far too much to air out dirty laundry. In any case, we amicably ended things, yet the door was still kept open for a potential return. It didn't seem entirely over. Even though I never wanted to go back for sloppy seconds. Then I got word from hooyo that he was getting engaged in May, it fell around my birthday. I commiserated about it for a couple months. I felt conflicted about turning him down even though he made attempts to reach out over the years. I had to remind myself why I said no. At times I'd still feel bad about it. It's August now and he's about to get married. I was still kind of let down but not quite over it. That was until I got a call randomly. Apparently, my aunt knew his family really well. Hooyo might have informed her that he wanted to marry me some years back and my aunt congratulated me for it. Turns out just because a guy is great or wonderful, if his family is problematic or controlling its best to stay away.

Emancipation of Sophisticate .

*Mentally I'm single again. I vow to flirt unconscionably. Scouts honour*



Would you refuse to marry someone if their family is troublesome/problematic

Walaalo, I have searched abundantly but I cant find a superlative to describe ur qurux.

I don't see how the person's family should influence my decision when it comes to marriage.

If the person fits my demands then why the f**k not?

Never marry into a crazy family lol

I got word from hooyo that he was getting engaged in May, it fell around my birthday.


I felt conflicted about turning him down even though he made attempts to reach out over the years. I had to remind myself why I said no. At times I'd still feel bad about it. It's August now and he's about to get married.

a guy wanted you, you said no, he found another woman, now you're mad, angry and bitter. typicall xaliimo keep it moving and get over it

Congrats! Free again!

I got word from hooyo that he was getting engaged in May, it fell around my birthday.


I felt conflicted about turning him down even though he made attempts to reach out over the years. I had to remind myself why I said no. At times I'd still feel bad about it. It's August now and he's about to get married.

a guy wanted you, you said no, he found another woman, now you're mad, angry and bitter. typicall xaliimo keep it moving and get over it

You are a selective reader. Quit cherry picking. I never said I was bitter. You clearly didn't read the ending. It's done. You are a troll, no need for further justification.

The beauty of life is that tomorrow is always better than today but we tend to cherish today since we have seen it.

How do you even know that tomorrow won't be a shitty day or if you'll be dead or alive tomorrow? I say enjoy what you got while you still can

missed opportunities are literally worst imo

you dont get the point, it address our fear of what will come as well our attachment to what we know or as they call it in the comfort zone.

Sophie, I love you more with each post walal
I got brother who's younger but taller than you if you're interested

You did the right thing, remember you're not just marrying the man you're also marrying his batshit crazy family.

Good for you Sophi, there's no shortage of good men, you'll do just fine

To answer your question, no. I wouldn't have the patience to suffer silly dramatics from in laws. An immediate family member is looking set to marry into a family with some downright strange people. I've hinted at the fact that it might not be good in the long run but never directly told him to think it through. It would be supremely heartless to have a hand in breaking a young girls heart on account of her relations.

Though you will still move on with your life I think it's only fair to yourself to accept that you will remember that person; good or bad and what could have been.

Would I marry into a crazy family.... The romantic in me says love conquers all but it comes down to how much of his own man he is.

My family is too large to not have crazies but they aren't controlling.