Why Do Women Refuse to Give Up

CigaalSHiiDaaDCFC · Postby **CigaalSHiiDaaDCFC** » Sun Dec 20, 2015 11:31 pm

one should never say 3 dalaaq at one time one is enough to divorce

Postby **Lamagoodle** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 12:15 am

Saddex dalaaq - at least according to the islam somalis practise(d)- are not usually the norm. Usually, it is one dalaaq because "waan ku furay= one dalaaq". Saddex dalaq is a manifestation of a rush decision (read; anger) and a divorce is something one puts alot of thoughts into.

Regarding the issue of not giving up; it is true. Most Xaawalaays think that they will not be divorced and therefore engaged in nacnac such as " i fur" "saddexdeeyda i si" "madaxeeyga ii dhig" etc. It is in their character. When you finally say " waan ku furay" reality dawns on them.

My advice; do not let her know that you are dating/marrying. That will result in maseeyr and you'd be stalked.

Sheikh Lamagoodle

gegiroor · Postby **gegiroor** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 2:03 am

There used to be this qadi (divorce judge) in Somalia who would marry the woman if she is being divorced in his court, especially if she was beautiful. If the man is divorcing the woman and the qadi sensed that the man was unjust, he would facilitate the divorce and marry the woman, especially if she was very beautiful, immediately.

To the the topic, may be she did not want a divorce and is heart broken about the whole thing. It is most likely that the guy is one of those who rush to dalqata whenever there is disagreement, and because of his past behavior, the lady thinks that he is not serious. Or it could be that she is sensing a second woman in the picture that influenced his divorce, and the lady is sticking around to make a point to that woman that she is not taking her man.

Whatever the case, we don't know the full story, therefore, we can't judge it. Anyhow, she will find a closure at some point.

Django · Postby **Django** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 3:04 am

Saddex dalaaq - at least according to the islam somalis practise(d)- are not usually the norm. Usually, it is one dalaaq because "waan ku furay= one dalaaq". Saddex dalaq is a manifestation of a rush decision (read; anger) and a divorce is something one puts alot of thoughts into.

Regarding the issue of not giving up; it is true. Most Xaawalaays think that they will not be divorced and therefore engaged in nacnac such as " i fur" "saddexdeeyda i si" "madaxeeyga ii dhig" etc. It is in their character. When you finally say " waan ku furay" reality dawns on them.

My advice; do not let her know that you are dating/marrying. That will result in maseeyr and you'd be stalked.

Sheikh Lamagoodle

Stalking
Warya There was this lady infact who forced her husband to divorce him after ahe found out he got married.She searched for his other wige later and would pelt the house with eggs and the police had to intervene.
Dumarka wa cajiib

GAMES · Postby **GAMES** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 3:18 am

So if u say it verbally than its Legal? What kinda B.S is that. People say some really mean and hurtful stuff in the heat of a moment or when they are angry.

But thats just reer baadiyonimo in my opinion. In America, when u get married, u do it in front of a court and when u divorce, u do it at court.

There is very clear legal line. Somalis need to catch up ASAP.

Hyperactive · Postby **Hyperactive** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 10:47 am

we do not accept 3 dlaq in one sitting. when we say 3rd dalaq means there were 2 previous ones on previous times in marriage life time.

Hyperactive · Postby **Hyperactive** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 10:49 am

working as a Divorce judge must be a lonely place, I think I have a slight hint on why you get frightened of the idea of Marriage being mentioned sometimes now. Shiekh Hyper!

it's full of drama place never lonely or boring. it gets ugly at times and it's so bad when there are kids involved. we marry people too.

Hyperactive · Postby **Hyperactive** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 10:54 am

So if u say it verbally than its Legal? What kinda B.S is that. People say some really mean and hurtful stuff in the heat of a moment or when they are angry.

But thats just reer baadiyonimo in my opinion. In America, when u get married, u do it in front of a court and when u divorce, u do it at court.

There is very clear legal line. Somalis need to catch up ASAP.

the problem here, there are people who marry; 2 witness and mahr but do not bother to register until later on when needs proof of marriage.

also you can verbaly divorce in our religion and culture. it left to people's discretionary and their integraty. that may worked previously but now it doesnt work and people can deny they married or divorced some one. hence we need to document it.

Postby **MujahidAishah** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 11:00 am

working as a Divorce judge must be a lonely place, I think I have a slight hint on why you get frightened of the idea of Marriage being mentioned sometimes now. Shiekh Hyper!
it's full of drama place never lonely or boring. it gets ugly at times and it's so bad when there are kids involved. we marry people too.

Inabti you should of been my qaadi ..miiska baan roogay the first time when your inabti refused. Meesha waa lugu kala yaacay

The second time we were called back I threw a set of keys in his face ..shiekh uu yaabay he grant the 3 So I wouldn't come back again :dead:

@ we marry people too

Hyperactive · Postby **Hyperactive** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 11:04 am

lool@Aisha. like you i grant them divorce to safe my self and husband's life.

Skippa · Postby **Skippa** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 11:11 am

There used to be this qadi (divorce judge) in Somalia who would marry the woman if she is being divorced in his court, especially if she was beautiful. If the man is divorcing the woman and the qadi sensed that the man was unjust, he would facilitate the divorce and marry the woman, especially if she was very beautiful, immediately.

What a terrible person ...Would he not even wait for the prescribed period to lapse? What about these woman that would acquiesce to it...ma adhi baa?

Postby **MujahidAishah** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 11:13 am

lool@Aisha. like you i grant them divorce to safe my self and husband's life.

Ooh yeah the qaadi was about to get it to when I heard him say they can work on it I was reloading for round 2 With the shiekh like this:

Hyperactive · Postby **Hyperactive** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 11:22 am

Aisha, ive seen difficult husbamds and wivies too. not many people come to court agreement to diviorce and sort out everything. there are people why say ; we divorced already just gove us divorce papers. those are easy.

TheCadaanGuy · Postby **TheCadaanGuy** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 11:29 am

i dont get it, if he divorced her three times, what's the reconciliation she hoping for? doesnt she know in islam if a woman get divorced 3 times there's no going back unless she gets married nd then gets divorced

Love is complicated.

This is why when people cheat, it's usually with ex.

Theguardian · Postby **Theguardian** » Mon Dec 21, 2015 11:50 am

Because they are hurt and when you are hurt you do irrational things.
You are taken over by love, grieve, lost, betrayal, injustices and pure hate yet deep down hope for reconciliation so you can heal.

Maybe this lady feels she didn't deserve divorce because she was good loyal submissive wife; why did he divorce her?

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