Your Sincere Advice Is Needed... Please no bashing..

[Wise-Man]

Kambuli, Now, you have made it clear for us. Well, in my point of view, that amount is not too much and I think it would be better if he gives her. But it depends on him though and how he values the relationship he has had with her. I don’t know what to say, but I believe if he says no, he has to explain himself clearly and honestly why he does not wanna give the money. Maybe he does not have enough money at this time and he is a little shy to tell her that. Honest is the best policy. I still insist that, it is not the time for her to move on, because they probably know each other well. But if she decided to do so, i am not blaming her either.

[kambuli]

My God!!!! Waar yaa dadka wax weydiin jirey!!!

Let me make it more clear...

1. There is no conspiracy on the sister's side what so ever.
2. THe guy is ok with the apartment...
3. There is a circumstance that kept them apart for 5yrs both of them are ok with it.
4. What worries the sister is " In Prinicipal"....that is the word....If he even lies and says I don't have money at this moment that would have been fine with her.... But what confuses the poor sister is THE PRINCIPAL thing.

I personally think, it is a way of saying " You do not deserve my money" You are dumped" What other meaning can it have?

[SomaliLight]

^^ kambuli, that is precisely what i asked you, does this guy consider their engagement legitimate??....does it mean "in principle" he has no obligation to her???

[kambuli]

Thanks Wiseman,

Sorry, I posted the above post before I read your response...

[B-MAX]

From a guys perspective.


You said:

(((A relative of mine( from my mothers side) was engaged to a guy she loved so much for the last 5 yrs...they are in different places...She is in Europe and he is in America...)))

Engaged for 5Years in a long distance relationship. Then buy me a house will definitely make any guy go crazy.



((((Last week she decided to buy an apartment... She needed money very badly.... )))

Another shocker. Out of no where SHE DECIDES to by an apartment! This is not like buying a pair of shoes,but a freaking apartment. This will tell you that her man-to-be DIDN'T know anything about it.

Who in their right mind will buy a house/apartment to a woman across the Atlantic that you never fully married to? Even a Somali Labeeb will have a hard time to swallow this scheme.


p.s This girl has raised the bar of Gold-Digger-Nimo into another level.

[Basra-]

People, people..People.... Read between the line here.This 'friend' .....who is.....


"is extemely honest.. not the type that even depends on other people even to the guy that she loves so much"




is none other than Kambuli herself. Ask yourself why this matter affects her so personally. I mean SERIOUSLY--- this friends description sounds more & more like Kambuli herself!


Kambuli is just wounded that--her 'reputation' was not believed or taken at value here. She is feeling disappointed even 'sad'.... that--someone as honest as her, sweet if you will as her --will be refused to be handed money just like that!!!! What gives the right to ask her fiancee, large amout of money like that? I mean-is she naive to risk being perceived as --not---Gold digger--but a Diamond digger? I think ---if she had sense she would have been cautious to beg such an absurd large amount like that! The stage of being a fiances--a woman --need not satisfy herself she has the man in her Xiina hand grasp. She should work harder to maintain the engagement & ultimately make him marry her of course--buy her the best south african diamond there is ! Habar yonis style! --You know some, subtle discreet ingenius things to make him dont say NO to anything she asks for.Kambuli or this friend is obviously a stupid one;she is not clever enough to make the man say YES to all her demands.


I say---the next move is --call the engagement off! Show him how serious you are.Chances are maybe he was waiting for prayers from the sky for you to get out of the engagement so that he is free to marry some Shaniqwa in america! Stop sitting under some dark room with fine curtains freshly imported from Abu dhabi & start controlling this relationship. If you are dull, ugly & nothing to recommend you to the opposite sex--then i would advice you to stick with him--dont get mad until the marriage happens & u have his kids--then u can start wearing the pants in the marriage!

[kambuli]

Ok..Ok..

First the sister is not a gold digger... If she was she would have asked him money before all these five yrs...

Secondly... It does not mean they did not have any phisical relationship..even they had a baby with each other... When I mentioned about the engagement I was trying to tell you that the relation ship is not a girlfriend thing...

So tell me what are you guys saying.... She is wrong? He is right I do not get it...Walaahay...

If one of my friends asks for money in a good cause not extrvagance walaahay I never said no.... Does that mean I am wrong???? What is this world going into... The sister broke down walahay... She is crying day and night.... and you guys are making fun of her...

[B-MAX]

((((Secondly... It does not mean they did not have any phisical relationship..even they had a baby with each other... ))))

This is not a Somali culture. Get engaged. Have babies. Then Get married.

[kambuli]

B-Max,

Who said there will be a wedding?
Meher is the most important thing in Marriage... not the reception...

Maybe I should have asked the advice from few reliable persons?

[Sir-Luggoyo]

Kambuli,

Everytime you inject a bit of info into this scenario, it gets more weird and interestingly bizzare.................. but you failed to say, who will live in this apartement? Is it the baby and his/her Mamma or the whole family including the Daddy? Who is moving in with whom? What forced them to live an ocean apart?



As Sir-Luggoyo,

I wouldn't spare a dime for a Halimo living that far when I am facing the chilly, bitter colds of New England alone, but would rather find me a happy Halimo with a section 8 voucher who needs company

[SomaliLight]

Kambuli,

let me get this straight,

1. waa la isku maheryahay, which means legally they are married.

2. she has his baby

3. He has been living away from her for 5 years

4.He refuses to help her out with financial problems.


..clearly this girl should ask for a divorce...not 2000 dollars man the guy probally is secrectly married to another sister....this is a sad story Kambuli....poor girl.

[LionHeart-112]

I honestly believe he is either:

1) Westernized fool who believes in the 50/50 contribution to relationships..

or

2) He is already married to another woman and has no plans to marry your relative.



a 3rd and more far-fetched explanation is that he is gay and u know gays don't live in apartments. Their flamboyant dancing and singing makes them the target of the apartment complex...Their neighbors call the police and they end up moving out to live in a house..or brokeback mountain where no1 but birds can hear them sing..

I hope this helps walaal. If u need more advice, give me a ring.

[kambuli]

Sir-luggoyo,

The sister lives with her parents...She lost the baby she had for the guy..there is no argument or muran between the two....He keeps telling her that he loves her and she is the only one for him.and I know that she loves him more than her life... The plan is for her to move to where he lives when everything settles down... Including her family whichshe is responisble in a way.... The guy knows that what is keeping her is very very legitimate... No argument about that...

See I do not want to tell everthing....

Sir quote " As Sir-Luggoyo,

I wouldn't spare a dime for a Halimo living that far when I am facing the chilly, bitter colds of New England alone, but would rather find me a happy Halimo with a section 8 voucher who needs company


Ma bakhayl baad tahay Waan ku nacay I hate bakhaylka walaahay... Teeda labaad what happened to loyalty? Why can't you sacrifice for a person if you love... mese tollow adduunkan jacaylba ma jiro ee waa ha is khayaameeyo oo hala kala danaysto

Somalilight,

Now you make a lot of sense..

Lion,

Gays don't marry females and pregnate them...

For sure he is married to another women.

[SoMaLiSiZz]

Asalam Alaikom Warhmatullah Wbaraktuh

5 years still no Guur ????????? now how is that ??????? I bet the tickets to go to him to the stats along with her wali would not be 10% of the money she is paying off for the flat!

5 years and still not married what in the world are they doing??? The woman is prioritizing buying and apartment and she has the nerves to ask a man who is not her husband to being with to give her some money!!!???? where is her manners ??

What is this sister on, is she a muslim ? if yes ===> how about you tell her to learn more about Islam clearly she is missing out some important points!

She needs to get her freaking prioritize checked Sobhan Allah may Allah guide ummat Mohamed Salwaat Allah w Salaam of Allah be upon him !!


Salaaamm!!!!!!!

[B-MAX]

Why do you have to bring Gay-comments in every thread?
There must be some connection right there!