Staying Genuine Is....?

[Kolombo]

Are you one of those people who cares a lot about what people think of you? Over the years I realized the only person that should be pleased with you is yourself. This may sound like your everyday cliche, but let's examine it closely. If you try to sound like someone else when you're talking to a girl, then you're being an appeaser. If you try to sound hard when you're kicking it with your boys, then you're an appeaser. If you're one of those people that goes with the flow at school or at work and works hard not to stand out, then guess what, homeboy? You is an appeaser.

Ask yourself this: why try to conform to someone else's ideology? Why do most Somali marriages fail? Let's be real here. Because before tying the knot, each partner was trying to be someone they were not; over-selling themselves, hiding their falacies while painting rosy pictures of themselves, trying to out-do each other. Then after the honeymoon phase passes, reality strikes home. One day you wake up & you see a lazy broad who wants to sleep in 'till 11am. Or one day you wake up and he's refusing to include your name on his checking/saving account. Was it worth it?

Do you have anger issues? Tell her. Are you a stingy sob? Tell her. Are you a gold digger? Tell him. This may sound like some crazy idea, but guess what? They'll like you for who you are and not for trying to be something you're not.

Be yourself, you'll feel better about yourself at the end of the day.

[Voltage]

Good advice.

[new-york24]

agreed.

if you dont stand for anything,your guaranteed to fall for evrything

salaan sare ugaas.

[Kolombo]

NY,

Salaan wacan, bro. How are you doing? Nafta bal ka waran?



Voltage,

Have you noticed how perfection is required of everyone in this culture? How people with social or physical disadvantages are either frowned upon or ignored? We're absorbing their culture without even realizing it. Everyone is designated a position in the hierarchy & if you don't conform, you're either a failure or weird. Even couples expect perfection in this hierarchy; often times setting themselves up for failure.

[Nabeela]

Be yourself, you'll feel better about yourself at the end of the day.

[Cawar]

Valid points. Though many ppl will not follow this advice..as ppl are different as how they view the whole world.

I am curious though.. what made you write all of this Mr Kolombo??

[Voltage]

That's why I go to class sometimes without brushing my teeth with huuro shining like the sun, my hair everywhere and at the same time nowhere looking like qodxo tied at the base, my dhar only jajab and raggedy looking, and purposely without my pens and paper.

J/k but I get what you mean sxb. No matter how you look at it it is impossible to be YOU in this world. There always has to be so many yous but the interesting thing is I dislike the people that can't adapt and conform to their situation as much as I dislike people that come out very impressionable. Funny aint it?

[Hard-Rock]

Koronto,
What you just describe there is an stage I think most people go through in their teen years or early college years. In that stage you are trying to figure out yourself and that's why you see many people experiencing drugs, bestiality in the case of Advo etc because of peer pressure and the need to fit in. But by the time one hits after the age of 20, they should have clear vision of their personality, preference and choose how they want to live their life being a loser or a person that is genuine and unique on their own way. As far as marriage is concern, you are definitely right, should have never project yourself differently in order to please your partner and get their admiration, once married reality comes to surface and you find out the bytch's fart is poisonous

[Kolombo]

Cawar,

Its part of the aging process sxb. I realized its best to be up-front & make your intentions clear, even if it means risking a lot. At the end of the day, it will be yourself that will stare back at you in the bathroom mirror. Its better to have your own convictions than life by another man's. Even women respect a man who shows genuine character, human beings can detect bullshiting from being genuine. Most guys think women can't tell their game, but guess what? They can and they do, except for maybe retarded broads.


Voltage,

I wear my khamiis on the subway on Fridays because commuting back to the Masjid is so far away. So, I wear my khamiis & cimaamad on the subway, all the negros stare at my attire, the whites whisper to each other, some of the blacks say "Assalamu Alaikum, brother" and I don't even give a shit. Rewind 10 years and I was a different person. Now, I'm like why care about what some kuffaar think of you? Its a process like Hard-Rock said.

[Warsan_Star_Muslimah]

Are you one of those people who cares a lot about what people think of you? Over the years I realized the only person that should be pleased with you is yourself. This may sound like your everyday cliche, but let's examine it closely. If you try to sound like someone else when you're talking to a girl, then you're being an appeaser. If you try to sound hard when you're kicking it with your boys, then you're an appeaser. If you're one of those people that goes with the flow at school or at work and works hard not to stand out, then guess what, homeboy? You is an appeaser.

Ask yourself this: why try to conform to someone else's ideology? Why do most Somali marriages fail? Let's be real here. Because before tying the knot, each partner was trying to be someone they were not; over-selling themselves, hiding their falacies while painting rosy pictures of themselves, trying to out-do each other. Then after the honeymoon phase passes, reality strikes home. One day you wake up & you see a lazy broad who wants to sleep in 'till 11am. Or one day you wake up and he's refusing to include your name on his checking/saving account. Was it worth it?

Do you have anger issues? Tell her. Are you a stingy sob? Tell her. Are you a gold digger? Tell him. This may sound like some crazy idea, but guess what? They'll like you for who you are and not for trying to be something you're not.

Be yourself, you'll feel better about yourself at the end of the day.

100% Agree

Salaam

[Kolombo]

As far as marriage is concern, you are definitely right, should have never project yourself differently in order to please your partner and get their admiration, once married reality comes to surface and you find out the bytch's fart is poisonous.

I still see grown men in their 40s trying in eey shukaansadaan gabdho as if they are still foodleey. Playing games like its still high school. Evolving is part of human conditioning, but some people are still stagnant in the game.

[new-york24]

kolombo.
can't complain ind,geeli wuu dhalay and the chicken eggs just hatched.

[Voltage]

Koronto, twice recently I've seen this Somali brother who wears a khameez on our campus. Both times I started thinking about me and if I have the courage to wear it like he does. Both times I concluded I don't but that doesn't stop me from admiring him. In due time I will reach that stage inshallah. This topic is good cuz it makes you think about what's really important at the end of the day. How others see you or how you see yourself

[Hard-Rock]

kolombo.
can't complain ind,geeli wuu dhalay and the chicken eggs just hatched.

I'm finna PM this msg to Kambuli to decipher for me.

Koronto, you are right, some niccas never grow up I have a cousin who at the age of 30 is still doing drugs and gang banging

[new-york24]

hard

who and what is this kambuli thing,walaahi i keep hearing it from members yet never came across it