A POEM FOR THE GUYS
I SHAVE MY LEGS,
I SIT DOWN TO PEE.
AND I CAN JUSTIFY ANY SHOPPING SPREE.
DON`T GO TO A BARBER,
BUT A BEAUTY SALON.
I CAN GET A MASSAGE WITHOUT A HARD-ON.
I CAN BALANCE THE CHECKBOOK,
I CAN PUMP MY OWN GAS.
I CAN TALK TO MY FRIENDS ABOUT THE SIZE OF MY ASS.
MY BEAUTY`S A MASTERPIECEAND YES, IT TAKES LONG.
AT LEAST I CAN ADMIT TO OTHERS WHEN I`M WRONG.
I DON`T DRIVE IN CIRCLES, AT ANY COST;
AND I DON`T HAVE A PROBLEM ADMITTING I`M LOST.
I NEVER FORGET AN IMPORTANT DATE.
YOU JUST GOTTA DEAL WITH IT, I`M USUALLY LATE.
I DON`T WATCH MOVIES WITH LOTS OF GORE.
DON`T NEED INSTANT REPLAY TO REMEMBER THE SCORE.
I WON`T LOSE MY HAIR,
I DON`T GET JOCK ITCH
AND JUST CAUSE I`M ASSERTIVE,
DON`T CALL ME A $@#!.
DON`T SAY TO YOUR FRIENDS, "OH YEAH, I CAN GET HER."
IN YOUR DREAMS, MY DEAR,
I CAN DO BETTER!
FLOWERS ARE OKAY,
BUT JEWELRY THE BEST.
LOOK AT ME YOU IDIOT...
AND NOT MA BREAST..!!
I DON`T HAVE A PROBLEM,
WITH EXPRESSING MY FEELINGS.
I KNOW WHEN YOU`RE LYING,
YOU LOOK AT THE CEILING.
DON`T CALL ME A GIRL,
A BABE OR A CHICK.
I AM A WOMAN.
GET IT?
YOU ceeb!?!
