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Ok! How far should a woman go in order to satisfy her partiner

SomaliNet Forum (Archive): Somali Women's Forum: Archive (Before Feb 2000): Ok! How far should a woman go in order to satisfy her partiner
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Anonymous

Unrecorded Date
How far should a woman go in order to satify her husband? I am not talking about in bed! but, rather a general common sense...I know it is a personal question and it depends on the relationship between you and your partiner. However, my partiner is not pleased with the way I dress...for instance, if I wear pants and blouse is not long enough to cover my rear area; he is upset... I can't color my hair or get a funky hair do......he is upset!!!
I don't expose my body and still, he does not like what I wear. My head tells me don't listen to him...my heart tells me may be I should...
But if I follow him I feel I have compromised my happiness.


My partiner is educated, romantic, generous, decent, and humble man.

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AXOOW

Unrecorded Date
TO:anony.

Sister,I'm a single man and believe me lately in the somalis community being single is better than married.Indeed,u have to realized being a single is defferent bieng married;because your husband is your partner....if he is your partner,u have to share every thing including ur appearance.Moreover,who u expose ur body is ur husband or the rest of the world.......who u make color ur hair ur husband or the rest of human being in the earth.Sister,wake up smell the coffe as u said ur husband is ur partner.....ur other eye.....ur other ear........ur other hand.......ur other leg......ur other brain......and he will be the last person in the world including ur parents that u talk to him when u r sleeping,and guess what there is no grantee u will be alive tommorow.

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Missy

Unrecorded Date

I think what you put ON is some think that you should be happy with period. We as women all have a deferent body structure and curves, and only you will now what looks good and flatter your body...with out dressing sleazy and trashy.

There are a lot of women who struggle, and battle with weight. When they loose or feel good about the way they look they like to try putting on something that fits all the right places.

In my opinion, he is your partner but this is your body....its his when the sun sets and you get cozy...if you know what I mean. At last girl indulge your body with the cloths that looks good, with out wearing a cheese cloths...


Missy shakes her sex behind as she logs out:

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X

Unrecorded Date
Anonymous-
I think what you wear and your hair is your business, and yours alone. If your husband loves and respects you he would be happy with whatever you wear.
If you don't stand your ground now it will be a life-long battle. Believe me, I have seen it happen to too many women. It starts of as honey, please do this for me, if you don't then he gets moody and then he starts demanding. It's a form of control.
Believe me, If he were a true PARTNER (an equal), he would respect your choices. You only live once, stand your ground. That does mean don't respect and love him. Controlling and love are two different things.

Best of luck
X

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Xaali

Unrecorded Date
Anonymous didn't you hear the proverb:
Iishiis laga arkaa, uushiis lagu tuma. Don't change your personality because of someone. HOWEVER, remember that live is about comprimises. So decide what is important. Think and put the issues on scale. What do you want?? Coloured hair and the latest fashion or a happy companion? which is more important to you?

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Ladan

Unrecorded Date
Annon!

If what you wear is not too revealing...then what is he complaing about?? Sis being single you tend to do lot of things that most married women wont do! But once you get married I suppose he has to change (50) and you have to change (50) in order you two to get a long, but if you say, I will still have my 50. What sort of a role model are you going to be for your children later on in life?? Sis think about it, and do what makes you happy, wear what you feel comfortable with! Remember you are a Muslim women don't wear anything...sleezy...and for that matter anything too revealing!

Peace~

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Anonymous

Unrecorded Date
Xaali:

I wanna have both....happy relationship and latest fashion trends...otherwise, I get depresst!

I am young ....I can't be looking old and grumpy....so what I am asking is: where do I draw the line...

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Xaali

Unrecorded Date
Where you draw the line is to be measured by the how bad you want what? My dear, women can not have their cake and eat it. Talk to your man; one of you has to comprimise.

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Kay

Unrecorded Date
It depends on what you wear. If a man feels his wife is showing a bit too much skin, then he has the right to dislike your attire. He might be jeoulos that other man are looking at you or just for religious purposes. However, you should not let him control you too much. If you feel you are not dressed freaky and he still doesn't like it then he'll have to compromise. It could start with telling you what to wear, then sooner or later, he will be manipulating you like a puppet.

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Kay

Unrecorded Date
It depends on what you wear. If a man feels his wife is showing a bit too much skin, then he has the right to dislike your attire. He might be jeoulos that other man are looking at you or just for religious purposes. However, you should not let him control you too much. If you feel you are not dressed freaky and he still doesn't like it then he'll have to compromise. It could start with telling you what to wear, then sooner or later, he will be manipulating you like a puppet.

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Guhad

Unrecorded Date
Ladan

constructive idea this time!!keep it in that way sis

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deeq

Unrecorded Date
sharmuuto
you wana sel your body to rest of people or you wana fallow your husband's order

waxaan umalaynayaaadoo kale marhore in aa ani naag ii noqoto ayaa fiicnaan laheed waayo naag laqabo oo rabta inay isqaawiso oo dhar kudhegen qaadato lama arag waxaas oo dhan markaan lagu guursan miyaadan soo sameen
ma isku xishoonaysid miyaa
mise hooyadaa ayaa madax qaawaneed oo qaadan jirtey surwaal iyo goono kudhegen
haday sidaasi jirto ka kuguursaday ayaa markii hore ba qaladka lahaa
anaguna hadaanahay wiilasha soomaliyeed
we don't like to see xaasaskayagoo sidii western udhaqmayoo dharkoodi sita

any good lucky
iyo midkugu raba qaawanaantaada
you can get african american or white people but no in our comunity

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brother

Unrecorded Date
To all my sisters with similar concerns.
As a man, I believe that my wife should satisfy me.If she dresses sexy, it should be only for my
me but not for any other man. For my wife to dress
in a provacative way and go into the streets, it is wrong. Bear in mind, this is a two way thing.
I will allow my wife to dress alomost anyway in my
house, in my prescence. After all she is my wife and we see each other bodies every night.It simple
easy, logic.

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MAD MAC

Unrecorded Date
Partners should respect each other. Does he sacrifice for you? You should be willing to go as far as he does. If he adjust to your wishes then I think you should do the same. If he doesn't then you shouldn't.

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khalil

Unrecorded Date
I m really appalled, shocked and confused here.
Look what Xaali , missy and X wrote down!. Where earth you guys live?. are you guys seriuos?. I know you can't stand when a guy wear something that you don't like. And all of you talk about how tasteless that guy is. So I am asking you take personal and think one's husband is control freak when he asks her what to wear. I guess u guys never had husbands and you don't know what it means to have one. So please stay away giving such unhealthy advises. What you wear should be only and only what attract your husbands. So as they. unless it is some dress code, like job or something. By the way why you like to attract the ohter people rather than your husbands?.

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Laila

Unrecorded Date
Men are always intimidated by women.
Men live in FEAR.
Men do live in another world.
Men do not apreciate what they have unless
they lose it.
Men should learn to say thank you.
Men are Jealous.
Men most of them have LOW self esteem.
Men are afraid of their shadow.

Laila

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hebel

Unrecorded Date
Ya male-bashing sexist U.
Ya ought to be sued for sexual harassment.
.
.
.
.
Ya freaking C?

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MAD MAC

Unrecorded Date
Laila
I definately appreciate what I have. Not only do I say thank you, I open doors, let her choose the movies we watch, let er pick the restaraunts we go to, I always pay. And she's ALWAYS nice to me. Always has a smile when I come home. What's the old saying "what goes around, comes around." If you're nice to a woman the chances of her being nice to you go way up.
Hebel
Chill dude. Maybe Laila had some bad experiences. Got knows there's enough dogs out there.

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muslimah

Unrecorded Date
wassalamualaikum warahmah,

ok i'm little confused with your little comment there sister, is your husband telling you what to wear in general, or is he telling you to dress moderately? if he's telling you to dress moderately you're to obey him...as a muslim women you should dress moderately and if you're not you're husband can and has to tell you to change your attire...if it's a matter of what colour of clothes or what style of clothes etc. then that is totally different...

you mentioned that he's a good husband overall...so why should you make a problem out of petty things like asking you to change your dress code...if you have a good marriage youshouldnot look for ways to create issues/problems...

have you told your husband how you feel about his requests? by the way he's your husband right? cuz i don't remember you ever mentioning that...yousaid partner but not husband...so which one is it...i think we've all assumed it was husband but it may not be...anyway girl you should talk to him solve this together...it isn't a big deal it's just a little misunderstanding

laila girl you've got some serious issues...what is it dat you have against men? and if one has done you wrong you shouldn't take it out on the whole male species, there are some that are very nice, considerate, understanding,compassionate,i can go on all day but i gotta go back to work...

hebel man you are hilarious... boy you funny...so are you gonna sue her? common i'll help you find a lawyer...or better yet i'll be your lawyer how about that? let me know aight?

well all take care and for anyone i might've offended i appologize

wassalamu alaikum warahmah

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hebel

Unrecorded Date
Muslimah
How about two counts of sexual harassment, for making bad remarks about the endangered human male species.
Three count of indecent exposure, for pouring her guts all over the floor.
And one count of bad moves (a simple misdemeanor) for making a shmuck out of herself.
.
.
.
.
That will drop her jaws to the floor.
I promise U we can her away for life.

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muslimah

Unrecorded Date
assalamu alaikum hebel,

lol, lol, lol, hahahahahah!!! woooooooooh! boy you funny...

hey you sure for life tho? remember imma women and i don't think i can do that to another women speciallay if she has kids...well unless it's for murder...now that's a crime i can't let go...but everything else we can scare her...(you know how somalis are so afraid of the law) just taking her to the court would be enuff if she makes it there that is...you know to the court i mean...but think about it...we'll get together and then decide on whether we should be HARSH to the sister or take it easy on her...aight partna...ok now i must do some work ba and take care

wassalamu alaikum warahmah

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